It’s NaNoWriMo. You know, National Novel Writing month? Where humans pledge to write an entire novel in a month? Like everything else in life, cats have a better version. My version of NaNoWriMo is held on the couch, hence the improved name NaNoWriMoCo, or National Novel Writing Month on the Couch.
Some time ago, I asked my fans to help me write an opening line for my novel. I’d do it myself, but I have a really busy nap schedule.
I’ve listed the suggestions created by my fans below. Vote for your favorite by leaving a comment, or create your own. Winners will be announced when I get around to it. In the mean time, I’ll be on the couch.
- It was the best of kibble, it was the worst of kibble.
- “You brought home a dog?” she asked in disbelief.
- I am going to murder a tin.
- There were two birds and only one stone cold killer named Fluffy.
- He was a hunter, a killer. He rid problems for a price. Want that mouse gone? You better have Friskies.
- They threw me off the couch at noon. That was their first mistake.
- Call me Ishmael, because my owner figured out who broke the lamp and is pretty pissed about it, so I’m fleeing the country.
- The human was expecting to sleep in on his day off. Boots had other plans.
- He was an old cat who ate sushi alone on the couch and had gone hours without a California Roll.
- Once, upon a couch….
- It is a truth universally acknowledged that a human in possession of a good couch and snacks, must be in want of a cat.
- It’s the story of a lone clawman for hire. A sad tail (hee hee) of rage and craftiness. A traveler on the road to more food.
- It was a dark and meowy night.
- I was lying on my back considering whether to tap the human’s hand or extend my claws and swipe deeply.
- MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! Three loud yowls ripped through the darkness, and I was off to the greatest adventure of my life.
- 3 am. Silence. Stillness, but no peace for I know they are coming. Slowly I clean the last crumbs of moth from my whiskers.
- I don’t know who my father was and my mom had many lovers but still I nap.
- It was the best of tuna, it was the worst of tuna.