Rate that lap…


Cats, take the following quiz to rate your favorite laps.  You can share your score as a comment to this post, so we can all compare.  Rate that lap!


Cocoa rates the squishiness factor

1.  SQUISHINESS.  When you sit on the lap in question, how squishy is it?

  • A. It’s like a marshmallow
  • B.  Mostly squishy, but some firm places
  • C. Rock hard abs and thighs

2.  TEMPERATURE.  How warm is the lap?

  • A. Above 98.6 degrees (37 C)
  • B. Variable – some warm areas, some cooler
  • C. Polar bears would find this lap chilly

 3.  WIGGLE FACTOR.  How squirmy is this lap?

  • A. No perceptible movement in a given 2 hour period
  • B. Some rearranging, but always gentle
  • C. Richter scale 7.2 or higher

4.  SERVICE.  When on this lap, how are you treated?

  • A. Premium snacks, on-site concierge, spa treatments
  • B. Snuggles and hugs
  • C.  Books and remotes have fallen on me

 5. CONSISTENCY.  How often does this lap go out of order, to accommodate human breaks?

  • A. Once per day, at most
  • B. A couple of quick stretches and kitchen trips per nap session
  • C. Every 10 minutes


This lap is highly rated


Add up your scores.  Give your lap three points for every “A” response, two points for every “B” response, and subtract 2 points for every “C” response.  You may award extra points for catnip covered laps, dog free lap zones, and any lap that makes you a happy cat.   Rate that lap!

How does your lap score?


photo crerdits: http://www.flickr.com/photos/midgley/864935736/
This entry was posted in catfoodbreath, lap, naps, rating, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Rate that lap…

  1. Michelle says:

    Sevvie writes: Hi CFB. My lap is around a 24. She got points deducted for consistency and she CAN be a bit of a fidgetbum but not too obscenely so. Dog-free zone entirely here so copped us an extra 3 for that (should be 6… no… 9…. 12?) but the slave reckons that would be cheating. I look forward to seeing if my lap is in the 1%.

  2. RainForestMoon says:

    My lap scored an 11, I am the 99%.

  3. Rebecca says:

    My lap scored a solid 17. Extra points given for being a dog free environment plus any kitchen trips do include feeding my Zoepuss her favorite treats.

  4. Sniglets writes: My daddy’s lap is my favorite, even though it only ranks a 3. What can I say. He’s my human.
    Jesse says: I prefer hips to laps. Especially hips on sleeping people. They all rank “a perfect 10.” Somehow they don’t seem to like it as much as I do.
    SamSam says: I’m still getting to know my new house. I tried out a lap once for about 5 minutes. It was really nice. I might try it again sometime soon. I do love cuddling next to my mommy at night though. That’s the best.

  5. clingycat says:

    hi cfb this is what I think of humum’s lap skills.

    1. SQUISHINESS A. the woman is a marshmallow, nothing hard about her.
    2. TEMPERATURE A. very warm which can be unfortunate in a semi-tropical climate, but her installation of air conditioning iscappreciated.
    3. WIGGLE FACTOR B. can sit still for lengths of time, but always moves me to another comfy position when she shifts.
    4. SERVICE B-C must investigate spa treatments & demand. she loves hugging me, but the above shifting has led to debris fall out.
    5. CONSISTENCY B I don’t mind the breaks, I get food a trip to the loo, next door to hers & a chance to annoy the other human.
    her lap sits around an 11, but those things called dogs do not exist here whereas air conditioning was installed with us in mind & I did get toona juice tonite. so let’s give her a 15 cause she likes odd numbers being odd herself I reckon.

  6. Tai Hawkes says:

    Tricky one for me as I have 2 laps so tend to move between them..have to keep both happy or my food supply might drop..I ended with. 13. Is that bad? Sometimes I think you people don’t understand how tough it is for us cats to keep you happy…but I do my best. Purrs

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